Zara's First Month!

I distinctly remember telling my husband during our first week at home with our newborn, "Daddy, I don't think I could go on with this! Hindi ko na ata kaya.." Of course, referring to most difficulties that first-time parents must go through: latching issues (can you say 'ow!!!'), a newborn who seemed to sleep thru the whole day (while we worry no end about hypoglycemia), a twitching c-section scar, lochia (na nakakaloka!), baby's piercing cries (wailing and lupasay-mode na iyak) from even just a drop of pee, fear of being fed black chicken (I don't know why, I just have a strong aversion to this ge-lai food haha), a general lack of sleep and the realization that our lives have really taken a different turn!

On our second day, I actually (desperately!) asked my mom and dad to come home already and just be here with me. Ganuong level na! It was almost an hour of crying over Viber and even my Auntie Nene had to comfort me through this. Never mind that the househelp and even my mother-in-law heard my sobs from the other room. They said being a mom would be instinctual and would come naturally, certainly wasn't the case for me. We definitely are going through a looong learning curve - learning by doing, practicing and just marching forward.

Our darling daughter - Zara Mireille Lim

Please don't get me wrong, I really love being a mom and we have been waiting for this moment since we got married :) I just didn't know that it would be THIS HARD to actually take care of a newborn baby with all her little but extremely urgent needs! Regardless of the books I read, the videos I watched, the prepared childbirth classes, breastfeeding classes and infant-care classes we have diligently attended, nothing could've really prepared me for this experience. AND it's just so easy to give up in the throes of extreme fatigue, zero sleep, not knowing what she was crying for -- I just felt so helpless that most times I ended up crying with her (hubby then had to pacify and take care of 'two babies').

But that's all behind us now :) well, at least most of those! Much as we felt so disoriented, just imagine what the baby was feeling di ba? From the warm comforts of the womb, she was 'yanked' into a cold, noisy and vast world. Just thinking about how Z must've felt makes me feel terrible for even complaining.

Right now I'm just extremely happy that we got through the topsy-turvy first month, just feels fantastic! :) While I don't know what the coming months have in store for us, I'm pretty sure that with God's help we'll do just fine.

Our first moments as a family -- with our carers and first visitors

Shelly, Aileen, Ayee and Grace with Z - thank you for the flowers Girlies! :)

So I just want to say THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU to everyone who helped us (ehem) survive! Thanks to our OB Dr. Lilibeth Genuino for giving us time to 'labor' our way before electing to have a CS; I guess I'll have to make a different 'birth story' entry at another time. Thank you to my hubby Andrew for just being there for me and baby, for being strong when the dreaded 'CS' verdict was handed to us, for remembering my bilins, for knowing how to carry baby, burp and change her diapers...very good job daddy! :) Thank you to my mother-in-law Mama Medy and my Lola Lina for staying with us in the hospital and teaching us how to care for baby. To my mom and dad for sending us help however which way all the way from the US. I know you were worried and really wanted to come home, Zara and I will be waiting! :) To my brother Arvin and Vien for checking on us every time, bringing food and hair-savers! My Tito Tony for cooking my favorite meals (super yummy sinigang na buto-buto and nilagang baka) and bringing me more goodies. To Amah and Auntie Shirley Co for the yummy malunggay dishes and other Chinese recovery food. Thank you to Ninong Raffy and Ninang Jojie for the beautiful flowers and balloons and also to the Girlies for the flowers they have sent! To my cousin Dr. Mike Demalata for assisting us and giving us assurances whenever I'm about to go cray-cray ;) Special thanks to the nursing staff of Manila Doctors Hospital for your superb care and service and also to the Lactation midwives/nurses/counselor you can't go wrong with Ms. Agnes and Ms. Lita Neri. And also to our helper/yaya Jen, who surprisingly is really experienced with babies, such a God-send! Thank you Mommy for 'lending' her to us :) Finally, thank you so much to my Baljon, Demdam and Lim family for all your love and support! :)

First Month! Thank you Mama Medy for the food you prepared, Auntie Bel for the yummy Z cookies and Auntie Shirley for my first choco cake!

Baked goodies from Tita Bel and Tito Paul Ang - thank you! :)

Happy first month our dear Zarita! We're always here for you and we love you so so much! Mommy and Daddy are excited to see you grow and do wonderful things in life! Hugs and kisses always, our princess! :)

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